Frisby: Always good for a bitch fest

Part 1: The burning dollars
So I walk into Wal-Mart and I have a hole burning in my pocket.

I thought about a 360. I must have had beer goggles on when I thought about buying it because I backed off of it like a fugly drunk chick when you get your sobriety back.

I walked over the Wii games. PLEASE let me spend some money. I look. This game, that game. They all look like great…rental games. If I bought any of them for $50 I might as well go wipe my ass with my money. RE4 on wii makes you almost pull the trigger but I played it already on Game Cube. I want something new!!! That’s why I bought this damn system.

I get over it and buy a bike instead. I’d take a Schwinn over a 360, how sad…for Microsoft.

 

Part 2: The WiFI blues

So I’ve said it 20 times over the last 2 weeks. Mario Party Ocho should have had online play. BUT, not having it gives Nintendo a great reason to make a Mario Party Nueve.

I look trough my DS games to get my WiFi fix and for some crazy reason Mario Kart sounds like a good choice.

I go WiFi. I wait…I wait…oh man 2 people…3 people…damn.

By the time I finally get a match I’m done shitting and my foots already asleep, but this time I would have whooped 3 Asian girls with hearts in their names at Tetris DS by now, but alas, 4 players have made it.

It starts off a little rough. 6 months have been unkind to my skills. First round goes to a snaker. No surprises please. One player drops. I come out snaking the next two because I will be damned if I waited 20 minutes for a game to loose to some douch in a yoshi egg kart. We go get to the last match and basically whoever wins decides the match. We get half way trough and I am owning, both people drop.

So I have this to say. FUCK MARIO KART!

I swear the Asian kid was not ready for the 3 Tetris’s in a row I rammed up their ass.

I came in, tetris, Tetris, TETRIS. Game over. Power button. Hit in run, no lube and no reach around.

*Note* I am not trying to single out an entire race here. It is damn near fact that 90% of the matches I have played have been against people who have names written in one of the many Asian texts the DS can render. Maybe some crackers are cute and write out their name in these characters so I digress. But seriously, it’s 4 in the morning on that side of the world when I play. Why the fuck are you up playing Tetris? Kind of like Ryan and Bill writing posts. Screw it, I’m just an ignorant American anyway. It’s pretty damn cool that I can connect with someone around the globe and speak with them in the international language that is tetris…and whoop some ass. Want a match? Come get some. *End Note*

Part 3: Calm down…breath.

So I start playing Half-Life 2 on the Box of X. God I hate that system. The game makes up for it but the load times make my blood pressure rise for a while.

I bust out excite truck and start kickin some more ass on it. Good times. Fun to listen to the music that was your life 5 months ago. I feel better, until I think about the fun this game would be online. I am calm about it now but I have to ask why.

The voices, they come to me to die. Why do they come to me to die? Why?

Rollin I hope you are enjoying your PS3, I really do.

I just got Metroid II on GB. I have some ass to kick. Good night now.

frisby